Katie Doyle, Girl About Town

Wednesday, Mar. 16, 2005 - 10:20 p.m.

Have I said lately I don't like lizards? Because, um, I really don't. Like, if I am walking thru the house and there's a lizard anywhere in my line of sight, I actually experience a shock. Like, leaping away and only just suppressing a shriek by heroic act of will. And to be totally honest with you, most times some sort of "aaah-AAAH" sound manages to escape me anyway.

And the point of all this is that the stupid cat brought in a lizard today which managed to escape detection until shortly before I started this. TB asked me to help him carry some stuff out to his desk, on accounta he can't really carry things, what with the crutches and all, and as I was trailing behind him, I spot this gigantic (fine; 4" long not counting the tail) lizard charging across the hall floor, and I screech to an abrupt halt and cry "lizard!" Which was actually much more calmly than I usually react to a reptile in the house, but which still startled TB, who, in typically male myopic fashion, had somehow managed to miss this behemoth as it charged with it's head fully up and tail splaying wildly, all the way across the hall.

Jeez, people. How the hell do you miss a 5" racing reptile charging up your hallway in bright light? Especially when your girlfriend, who is meandering along at least 3 feet behind you spotted it with no effort at all? Sheesh.

So to wrap this thing up, TB tried to catch it, but as it was not stunned by the cat and playing dead, it wasn't having any of the captivity thing, and ran out the open doorway and behind the washer, where I'm sure it will patiently wait until the lights are out and the house is peacefully slumbering, blissfully unaware and vulnerable, and then it will slip back into the hall and into other parts of the house, where I'm sure I will encounter it in all its creepy, slithery 6" reptilian glory when I am in the house alone and utterly freaking defenseless...or at 7:30 tomorrow morning, when I get up to take my shower.

Stupid freaking cat.

Peace out,
Katie

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