Katie Doyle, Girl About Town

Sunday, Mar. 23, 2003 - 1:43 a.m.

I really don't like to post twice in one day to this thing, but wow, I had an experience to share.

Also, I would like to add that sometimes when I read other peoples 101 Things lists, I feel compelled to comment on them with my own list. It's kind of weird. I would like to add for one of you - you know who you are - I used to know someone with a cat named Keegan. It's a good name. He was a cool cat.

Excellent Quote(s) of the Day:
"i love a good steak, so i try not to get to know any cows." --goodlovin, on the ramifications of hunting/eating. Sort of.

So anyway, on to The Story.

It was a nice day today, so even though I slept in and all and am not being productive in the tiniest little bit, after I finished up here earlier, I headed out to the local 1 Hour Photo joint to drop of some rolls of plant pictures. They were closed, sadly enough, so I drove thru the neighborhood on the way home, to give The Boyfriend some extra time alone, and to maybe get in a few shots before the light went. And, you know, I was in kind of a lackadaisical, "isn't this a nice day, why don't I try to prolong it since I'm such a loser and slept late" kinda mood. So I'm driving around, and I see this pretty cool bunch of succulents (which names, both common and botanical, evade me at this time) with really neat big cones of small yellow flowers on stems over them, and I think "well those are nice, let's take a shot or two of them," and I pull up and over and then walk back to do so. I had to pull up and over because the streets in my 'hood (thanks, Ali G.) are tight (narrow), and you have to be pretty selective in where you pull over. It's all no parking, but everyone parks there anyway, which can be really annoying and dangerous when you come home on a Friday night and some yahoo is having a party with a million Republican friends, all of whom drive big ol' honkin' SUV's, and there's like maybe 6' to pass between them and get up the hill to home, maybe. But I digress. Seriously, people.

Anyway, I pull over and walk back up the hill a ways and take my pictures, and then as I'm walking back to my car, I see this really ugly flower down the hill. It was pretty unusual looking and kinda fascinating in its ugliness, so I decide to take a picture of it. And upon inquiry, the lady across the street told me it was Cup of Gold, which was nice, because that meant I could label the damn picture when I got it back. And it came in handy about half an hour later...

So anyway, I take a coupla pictures of this ugly-yet-interesting flower, and I note what plants it's with in the landscape, and I file all that away for use on some future landscape plan, and I think yeah, it's kinda ugly, but it's also kinda cool-looking, the buds are rather nice, and it looks really great all twined around this Jacaranda and with the blood red bougainvillea plant, so this could be neat if someone wants a tropical garden. And it had really spread, too. It was a pretty damn big plant. ANYHOW, I take my pictures, and twice I reached out to move withered blooms out of frame. That's it, just twice. I pulled on the first one a little, to see if it would come off the vine, but it didn't, so I had to twist it out of the way twice, so I guess in actuality, I touched the damn thing three times. Three Measely Times. Then I took my pictures, ran outta film, and went home.

Once home, I got a piece of olive bread to munch on while I headed on over to the computer to look up Cup of Gold, and found out it's also called chalice vine, the botanical name being Solandra maxima. I finished my bread and used a fingernail to remove a little out of my molars (shut up, you do it too), and then I put the tip of my little fingernail between my teeth and rested my chin in my hand while I read up on chalice vine.

Not even 5 minutes later, I suddenly got hit with a wave of dizziness, nausea, insanely vicious vertigo, and serious brownout. It scared the hell out of me. I almost fell out of my chair, it was so extreme. My face flushed, and I thought "well, this isn't normal." I tried to get up and had to pull myself out of my chair and then hold on to stuff all the way thru the room, because I couldn't walk without support. I seriously didn't think I was going to make it outside, to The Boyfriend. I thought I was going to pass out before I even hit the bedroom door. But I got to the outside door and called his name, and he took one look at me and came running, and I clung to him while he maneuvered me into a chair and started asking me questions like hadn't I taken my new allergy drug last night and been fine, or had I had any reaction like this last night? Hadn't I eaten the olive bread already? When was the last time I ate? Could I breathe? After 10 or 15 minutes, I still felt drunk as hell, but the most intense vertigo and nausea had gone, so I got up and came back in here to continue reading about chalice vine...and got to the bottom and found out it's highly toxic. In fact, it can be fatal. Mystery solved. But boy, lemme tell ya. I hardly had any of that in my mouth, and it was pretty ugly. I can still feel residual wooleyness in my head and a listing to the left from it. So if you have this freakin' plant in your yard and you have children or pets, make damn sure it doesn't get eaten. I can only imagine the reaction a small body would have to eating any sizeable amount of this stuff, even a small piece.

And for cryin' out loud, when you're out pokin' around in strange plants - or probably any plants, for that matter - you should probably wash your hands before you go holding bread and putting your fingers in your mouth. That's all I'm sayin'.

Man. And I thought those orchids were scary...

Peace out,
Katie

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