Katie Doyle, Girl About Town

Monday, Oct. 20, 2003 - 9:40 p.m.

I have been reading blogs and pondering the nature of them...or rather, the nature of those who keep them. What makes us think what we have to say or the things we think about are interesting enough to strangers to post them in this public manner? How do we choose the things we're willing to reveal about ourselves this way? And more importantly, why are we willing to reveal them? I am always rather amazed when I come across a beautifully written blog/diary, especially one that reveals something meaningful about its writer. That this person is also so daring as to reveal this thing about him or herself to complete strangers, some of whom will not be kind, some of whom will go out of their way to be callous and asinine. Wanton random destruction is the worst kind, in my opinion, and there's a lot of it in the world, and a fair share of it on Diaryland, judging by the number of diaries going "underground" these days. I, myself, try never to get too into the things that hurt me in this world. I don't post sensitive poems about it, and in fact, I pretty much try to avoid that kind of thing altogether here, because I feel this ridiculous demand to be pithy and glib most of the time, which really, I am not all that great at, and which I pretty much tend to shove aside when I'm pissed off about something, but I feel like people don't really want to hear about my personal crap, so for the most part, I try to keep it out of here. Not all of it, but the really deep, depressing parts. I wonder at the daring of people who don't filter themselves like that. Some of them embarrass me, others I find beautiful and poignant, and I wish I could hug them and take them out for latte and tell them everything will be alright in a commanding way that *does* make everything alright, so that their paths unfold in this huge curving garden full of flowers and dogwoods floating on the breeze and almost nothing but joy from here on out. And I wonder how God manages not to do that for every person full of pain in the entire world. And how shitty people can tromp all over others and not care that they hurt them, or even derive pleasure and satisfaction from doing that damage.

I love Diaryland, frankly. I think Andrew's done a bangup job and deserves kudos. It's gotta be a lot of work for way less money than it merits. And on top of that, he provides this community where I can spout out and sometimes feel connected to people because they get the same damn things I do. Or because they dealt out an epiphany I really needed to come by, and I think man, is that person smart, or what? I laugh a lot too, because some of these people are just damned witty, funny people. And some of them are incredible writers I wish I could match. I love when someone sends me an email saying they get it, like this private joke or cosmic "duh" that we're both in on, and I realize the world does not suck as much as the 6:00 news would have us believe. Maybe we wouldn't like each other so much in the physical world, where mannerisms and habits and vocal inflection and the minutiae of life get in the way, but damn it, here on Diaryland, we get the important things, like how ridiculously silly the world is, that some people are just assholes at heart, and that who you are has substance, even if only 5 people in the entire world know it. At least the 5 I wrote this for, anyway.

Peace out,
Katie

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Yesterday's News - Next Stop

In which Katie shares sad news - Wednesday, Apr. 01, 2015
In which Katie returns after a very long absence - Monday, Jun. 25, 2012
In which Katie pokes her head in and brushes some of the cobwebs away - Thursday, May. 06, 2010
In which Katie asks you to write your congressman again. - Monday, Jun. 02, 2008
In which Katie asks you to please click the link and send the message to protect the rights of artists - Wednesday, May. 21, 2008