Katie Doyle, Girl About Town

Friday, Nov. 03, 2006 - 6:18 a.m.

Hi, Peeps. :) I just want to say how much I appreciate all the support from you guys, both in comments and in emails, and that you offered it not only for me but The Boyfriend, as well. You guys rock. :)

And also, "fall" has come to Paris, and it's coooooold. Like, the high today is 48 degrees. I realize that to you peeps up in the Great Canuckistani North and the far reaches of American Siberia, 48 degrees probably sounds like a walk in the park. But that's like LA winter to me, and frankly, it's a tad on the chilly side. However, it seems to have also brought with it at least a few hours of deep blue sky and gigantic fluffy white clouds every day, so I'm hoping to get stuff done the remainder of my stay....YAY! Especially coming as it does on a week of really hideous grey, I am just so happy to see it. I kinda wish I was going to be here to see Paris in winter. But only kinda, and a very small part of me, at that, because I am so ready to go home. I really look forward to jumping in and getting stuff done, getting back to my life. As fabulous as this has been, I miss The Boyfriend, I miss my friends, I miss my space. I even kinda miss the cat a little...which I'm sure I'll get over within nanoseconds of the first bloody gopher or lizard. But she's a very loving little creature when she wants to be, and that's very pleasant. I feel really motivated to jumpstart my life again, and I really look forward to getting into it. I'm excited for the first time in a really long time, and it's awesome. I'm so happy I came to Paris, I can't tell you. I got incredible and much-needed down time, and found some things I really care about getting done, which hadn't been the case for a very long time.

And too, I admit that the relationship is also a huge part of it, now. For the first time in quite a while, I feel hopeful and excited about that, too. And really, really happy. And also more than slightly terrified everything will now fall apart, because that's historically how my life has gone...everything's going great, or feels like it, and then a person gets slammed with cancer, or some other traumatic and financially draining event. So there's some trepidation in viewing a life that seems to be turning out really well. Maybe I sabotage stuff so that I won't be afraid of the fall. Because dude, the fall sucks. It can also be self-fulfilling, so I'm trying not to really even think about it. Which is hard, because my nature is to constantly remind myself that it could all fall apart any second now, so that I won't get my hopes up and be crushed when it "inevitably" does...which probably contributes to the self-fulfillment aspect, so I'm trying to not do that. You can't stay motivated and ambitious when you think it's going to dissolve, anyway. So, much as it terrifies me, I think maybe I should just dive in head-first and let it all run its course, come what may.

Holy crap.

Peace out,
Katie

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Yesterday's News - Next Stop

In which Katie shares sad news - Wednesday, Apr. 01, 2015
In which Katie returns after a very long absence - Monday, Jun. 25, 2012
In which Katie pokes her head in and brushes some of the cobwebs away - Thursday, May. 06, 2010
In which Katie asks you to write your congressman again. - Monday, Jun. 02, 2008
In which Katie asks you to please click the link and send the message to protect the rights of artists - Wednesday, May. 21, 2008